Saying goodbye to a comatose metaphorical baby

I initially started this blog as a journal of my revitalised vigour at continuing with my book. That vigour had died. It's not that I've lost the will to write, it's just that I cannot see any way to continue with the book that doesn't infringe on the copyrights of Reign of Fire or an upcoming movie starring paul Giamatti, apparently.

Incidentally, I had the Reign of Fire idea first. It just took longer than I expected to get the fucker finished. Bastards.

Anyway. Should you wish to view my unfinished symphony, a Doc file can be downloaded from rapidshare here

I will be starting another baby soon. I've got ideas coming out of my ears, I've just had them on a back burner for 3 years as they wouldn't fit into the existing storyline. I tell you, I'm a literary genius just waitng to explode onto the world. You'll see.

(Insert witty closing statement here)

What I'd do if I won the lottery

It's a question posed within the confines of many a skull 4 out of 7 days a week, in the UK at least. It's not helped by the countless 'super jackpots' or 'rollovers' that lets the unwashed masses believe they've got a better chance of winning it this week. It's 1 in 14 million. that'll never change.

But.. on the off-chance...

A very large house, one with many rooms. You ever play Resident Evil? That house. Minus the zombies, natch. Failing that, a large house for us, the kids and family, plus several cabins out back for guests. Might even rent them out as a B&B.

I'd have to have an Italian supercar. I've always wanted a Countach or Diabolo, but apparently roadtests aren't favourable in their reviews, so I'll have to go for a Murcielago. But not in yellow.

The rest i'll probably give to the wife.

But I've got to have my cinema. 50 seats. Dolby. Bar. Amusements.

Might even have a function hall, rent it out for weddings...

Just speculating, not like I've just won it or anything. oh no.

My Mate Kev and his sad tale

Several year ago, I had an online conversation with Kevin Smith, director and co-star of 5 very well known films and one upcoming one. Basically, I'd defended Dogma on the ViewAskew boards from the ramblings of some fundamentalist moron who didn't get the gag, and Kevin contacted me through my hotmail address, he set up a temp hotmail addy himself and chatting was to be had.

He's a cracking bloke, really nice guy and the converstation flowed nicely. Until I asked how Jason was doing. Then there was a pause. Just after I typed "Hello? You still there?" Kevin said "He bolted from rehab again". Jason Mewes was a drug addict, a heavy use one. Kevin Smith loves him like a father and it was heartbreaking to read what Kevin was telling me, a complete stranger, about someone he'd taken under his wing, yet shrugged it off for another fix time and time again.

Jason Mewes is one of those guys you hate with a passion or you want to have him be the godfather to your kids. His persona in the movies as Jay is exactly how Jason is. If you were ever unfortunate enough to see R.S.V.P, you'll see how wide Jason's acting range is: Not very. However, during the filming of Dogma, he was high on either Heroin or Oxycontin every day. There's a scene in that movie 'Holy Bartender' where Jay 's asleep, sitting in a chair. No reason, just asleep. During filming the scene where Rufus (Chris Rock) is explaining to Bethany (Linda fiorentino) about why she was 'chosen' Rock suddenly starts laughing. Smith yells 'cut' and asks Rock what's so funny. Jason is asleep, standing up. Heroin addicts don't sleep like us. They get their heads down for about 2 hours at night, after that it's 5-minute 'quick naps'.

Why am I telling you this? Why, while I'm waiting for the bread to finish, am i recounting past memories of someone I've never met, and probably doesn't know I exist (unless Kevin told him about our conversation)?

At the end of the conversation, I said to Kevin "If he ever gets his head sorted out, you should write about this shit. If he can get clean after all that dope he's done, it needs to be told. He should be a fucking poster boy"

He got clean. Kevin wrote about it (Off his own back, I'm not taking credit for this). it's a hefty slab of reading, but it's from the heart and damn is it inspirational stuff

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9

Jason Mewes has now been drug-free for 3 years, and given the life he had, it's incredible that he's done it. You might say that the money helped, but how? The guy had money coming out of his fucking ears and he jacked it all. After Jay & Silent Bob strike back, Jason blew his cash so quickly he was hanging around the editing suite trying the score some cash from Kevin 'Just for one fix, to get my head straight', before the movie was even released.

Clerks 2 is coming out in August. Jason & Kevin aren't the main stars, but dammit, i'm gonna watch it for them. Cause they make me smile.

I will be writing something incredibly deep and profound soon

Promise...

Bloody tumbleweeds

Quiet, isn't it? Truth be told, it's been a boring week. So to fill it with pointless drivel would probably lower the tone. (shaddup at the back)

Well, the sun has started to beat down. Hosepipe bans are in effect and I've instantly gone pink.
It's far too hot today..

Oh yeah, got a photoprinter today and it's jolly goood...

I'll be funnier next time, promise.